Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Dear Husband,

I'm not sure how I managed 7 years of driving without knowing you. Your constant "why are you in this lane" and "shouldn't you get over" are ever so informative and constructive. I've lived in this town for seven years, and you three. I'm fairly certain I am capable of navigating the streets.

Furthermore the sighs and gasps are rather distracting. I realize I may test the strength of my brakes a bit more than you'd like, but is it really necessary that there is now a hole in the passenger side floorboard from your "imaginary" brake? I think not. In addition, kindly loosen your grip from the handle of the door.

I claim not to be the best driver, and have a host of tickets that will tell you the same. However, if memory serves me, your number is quite comparable.

While I'm certain you mean well darling, it is clear from the tinkle left in the seat that you're uncomfortable with my driving habits. Therefore I'm more than happy to hand over the keys and allow you the privelage of driving whenever and wherever we got together as it really isn't that thrilling to me anyway.

With Love,

Your Darling Wife (reading in the passenger seat)

P.S. It's not that cute when you pretend the dog is saying things like "Get me off of this roller coaster."


JayJenny said...

LOL! You are a funny chica!!

Mr. M said...

Dear Wife,

I must say if you count the number of tickets it recent years the numbers are QUITE different. While your statement is fair that I have had some tickets in my time they were all so long ago and I learned from the reckless mistakes of my youth.

It should be noted that my concern is only meant to promote your safety because I care about you. I don't want any harm to come your way due to poor planning in lane changes, short stopping, or driving on the wrong side of the road.

When you almost rear end other vehicles I will admit it does frighten me a tad. In the future instead of grasping the door handle and otherwise bracing myself I will jump out of the vehicle so as not to distract by gasping.

Your Loving Husband,

The Mr. M

P.S. I'm not pretending.

Anonymous said...

OK, too funny! Even Mr. M's letter!

Matt HATES to ride with me! He says I tail people & drive too fast! But, I don't.

So, everywhere we go together, he drives.

brittny said...

AHHAHAHAHA that is so great. How funny that MR. M responded. What is it with guys and having to be in control of driving situations anyway?

Swistle said...

My two favorite parts:

1) Your p.s.

2) Mr. M's reply.