Friday, June 01, 2007

Today's post brought to you by the letter "A"

Some people are Asshats. Not matter what they'll always be Asshats. Asshats is my new favorite Adjective to describe these special people. (Ok, so here I'm using it as a noun, but it can totally be an Adjective.)

I mostly still Aspire to get away from said Asshats, although I also Aspire that it will be through a different Avenue. Get me?

I'm Aware that perhaps I need a different Attitude. I'm also Aware that if you Approach me with that suggestion right now, I'll kick you in the.... (see Above).

I'm also rather Annoyed with the Ants that have taken over my kitchen. I could handle them crawling around the sink a little and following the peanut butter spoon to the dishwasher. Nothing gave me more joy than watching them all gather there and then turning on the high temp wash for a good 30 seconds with an evil laugh! But now, oh now, those little bastards (Astards?) have gone too far. Over the weekend they found their way Across the kitchen and up to the high cabinets and they Ate my cereal. THEY ATE MY CEREAL! We've done everything. The only option I see left is to empty the house and burn it down and watch those little Astards burn! But that would be Arson. That's not my thing.

Lastly, I'm going Absolutely Apeshit. I'll let you know when I return.

Just kidding, one more thing. I want an Apple. Perhaps in it's more sophisticated form of an Appletini.

10 comments:

Kristen Miller said...

What an Absorbing post! You crack me up!

Mmm...an appletini! I'm so jealous...one day soon my friend.

Emily said...

You crack me up! I needed a good laugh!

JayJenny said...

I love it Mrs. M!

Burn those damn ants, they ate your cereal, and we all know that means war!

Beth G said...

Love the post today. . .I'm having the same frustrations. . .
Asshats=Chrysler Financial (see my blog for more on this)
Ants= ugh, they just appeared this year in our house and I'm almost to the point of arson also. . .
Appletini=sounds great about now. . .

brittny said...

Amazing. No- ASTOUNDING. I Appreciated your Awesome smarts. I hope you're having a weekend Accomodating to All your Aspirations.

...

Okay, I'm out. it's time to go home and I can't think anymore. :) You're always so funny. Thanks for brightening my day!

PS- the pouty picture of you is too cute!!

guygm said...

That prom story cracked me up. Mad Props on the cover story about why he dumped you a week before prom!

Flawed & Disorderly said...

Speaking of asshats, word is spreading across the U.S. that your prom date was and still is gay. I totally believe it. I'm going to tell more people right now.

Haaaaa ha ha!

brittny said...

I'm officially blog stalking you. I miss you Mrs. M!

brittny said...

I'm officially blog stalking you. I miss you Mrs. M!

it's me, Val said...

Ha! Hope you got to enjoy that appletini!