For Your Entertainment

Saturday morning I received a call from my boyfriend asking me to dye Easter eggs with him. His mother had offered but he was very insistent saying he "only dyes Easter eggs with La La."

J and I went to babysit on Saturday night so we set up shop for some egg dyeing fun. Girlfriend immediately swooned J into going to the market for more eggs.

Boyfriend is obsessed with (you're not going to believe this) rednecks. This kid loves talking about rednecks.

Just a sampling of some of the things out of his mouth, followed by fits of laughter:

As soon as we walk in the door:
"Hey J, you wanna play rednecks?"

When his dad heads down stairs:
"Hey O, bring me a beer!" followed by "that's what a redneck says."

When finishing up the applesauce in his bowl he dove his face in it to lick it clean:
"That's how a redneck eats."

When hearing a loud car go by:
"There goes a redneck."

Out the blue:
"Hey La La, I went into the woods once and I saw mice, rats, and rednecks."

Other fabulous quotes from the evening:

When his parents arrive home his dad opens the fridge to see several cups of Easter egg dye.
"Sweet, La La taught the kids to make jello shots."

Then, Mrs. R asks how Bear (a mere 3 months old) was to which my darling husband responds:
"Oh, she ran around raising hell all night."
Followed by: "She was great! She was held, rocked, kissed, fed, changed, she could only have been better if La La would have given her a boob."

So after Mrs. R and I chatted for quite a bit, it was after midnight when we were on our way home. Suddenly my memory sparked and I realized I'd forgotten my pill that evening. This is how it went:

Me: Ugh! I forgot my pill, remind me to take it as soon as we get home.
J: What? The three kids all night didn't do that for you?

Yes, this is my life.

Quote de Jour a la My Hubba Hubba

Background: Extreme caffeine intake in the afternoon and evening has been known to keep my husband up late at night. Especially the sweet tea variety of this caffeine.

Tonight I had JLK and Hubs had a business dinner with some associates who were in town.

Me: You didn't have tea did you?
Hubs: No, I had beer.
(pause)
Hubs: What? There's no caffeine in it.

Well, I guess he has a valid point.


*J also said the funniest thing when we went to The Orangery. It was one of those moments where I said "That's a quote!" And I was so excited to share it, but I forgot it. And (obviously) still haven't remembered it. I know I should have broke out my post its right there with the wine.

Duex Quote de Jour

I love my friends!

Quote de Jour a al Mrs. S:

(after which we had our little hen fest of bickering, whining, and complaining about in-laws (and of which I take great contentment that hers are worse! I know, shame on me!)

Me: We're going straight to hell aren't we?
Mrs. S: You bring the wine, I'll bring the shots!


Quote de Jour a la Ta Ta:

(on trying on dresses to which I informed her the one I was lacing her in was a Naggie Pottero (because I'm not getting paid to say her name!) and that is why it required she sign away her first born)

TaTa: Who?
Me: Naggie Pottero, she's a fancy pantsy and expensive wedding dress designer.
TaTa: Pfft, I don't care if it's designed by Larry the Cable Guy as long as I look pretty in it!

Quote de Jour, a la My Little Boyfriend

Last night I had dinner at the R house. Boyfriend was very excited to set the table and make a special place for me right next to him. As we began dinner he looked at me and said:

"La La, I'm in love with you, you're my one true love"

Quote de Jour, a la Mrs. S

Not so long ago, Mrs. S and I were discussing our "trophy wife" status. I was recently out with my husband and had several drink offers (which I graciously accepted). I was clearly with a man who, given the shiny rock on my left hand, was my husband. We were with friends who asked if J cared....hardly. His response: "I'm not paying, load her up! She's still going home with me tonight."

So given this recent event, I get a voice mail from Mrs. S last night:

"I may be old, I may be married, but by gosh I can still get a free drink!"--Mrs. S

I love it! Cheers to you Mrs. S, use your attributes wisely. Can't wait until the next time we can hit the town together.

Quote de Jour, a la Mrs. S

The group commonly known as the bracelet girls are planning a weekend getaway in April. We've not all been together since the last of us got married last June, so it's definitely time. It took us until April to coordinate plane tickets and schedules. Mrs. S and I have spent several weeks looking for remote cabins that sleep 5, and simply must have a hot tub*. Our motivation is to visit, drink wine, relax, have a little therapy, drink wine, unwind, catch up, and drink wine. I finally found a cabin with breathtaking views, a huge new porch, and a hot tub. Furthermore, it was half price of every place in the area that we'd looked at! (Remember, I'm cheap, I knew if there was a deal, I'd find it!)

AND, you're not going to believe this. Under activities, it listed drinking. How profound! Besides that, it boasts to have zebra skins, not that's something we're all interested in.

So back to the quote. Mrs. S and I were discussing the arrangements and decided that that this is obviously the best option and I should book it. Actually what she said was (drum roll please....)

"I just need food, wine, a hot tub, and a place to pass out, I'm an equal opportunity alcoholic."

*Then you can think you're getting warm and flushed from the water, not the wine!

Quote de Jour

A couple more good ones:

"Something about Monday's make me the housewife from hell! I feel the need to do on Monday what everyone else does all week! And I shed! It's not dog hair in my car, it's Mrs. S hair!"--Mrs. S


"Oh he's lying in the den watching TV, probably thinking of what's going to ail him in the morning"--My Dad (obviously not recently since he's dead and that would kinda freak me out) when I asked him what my little brother was doing. Little brother was infamous for being a hypochondriac and avoiding school or coming home from school as much as possible. Once Dad died and he had no one to come pick him up, he was cured!

"I know I'm right, I'm good lookin' too! It's just something I've learned to deal with!"--My Husband