Do you know what he did this time?

My dentist has a crush on me. I'm sure of it. I know this because when I went for my last cleaning a couple of weeks ago. He said I had a cavity. Why else would he tell me this and have me come back after my last little incident there.

This time, he didn't make me wait. In fact, they met me at the door with a laughing gas and plugged me up. However, they also now treat me with the kid gloves of a three-year-old. The hygienist (who was probably afraid of me after reading my chart) offered me strawberry nose--as in to breathe the laughing gas through. A strawberry nose! Ok people, who can resist the offer of a strawberry nose? Certainly not me. And also they said things to me like this:

"Open reeeeeaaaaal wide! Try to keep your mouth open for me. GOOD! JOB!"

I mean at least I wasn't asked to roll over and play dead, right?

I'm proud to report that I wore my big girl panties and made it through this visit with no tears. However, I did kick my shoes off when I got really relaxed and comfortable. I mean, who can actually relax in shoes?

But let's get to the real question here. Do you know what he did do? Besides offer me the strawberry nose? He reverse muzzled me! Apparently I was so relaxed and so kicked back on the dock of the bay with Otis Redding that I couldn't keep my mouth open. So they put this little clamp thingy on the inside and then around my chin and clipped. It kinda hurt. But you can't really say anything with your mouth held open. So I went back to the dock of the bay.

With my strawberry nose.